Rappers are always talking about what they’re gonna do when they catch the blogger who’s dissed the shit out of them. Hip-hop bloggers are shitting in their Penny loafers! I guess, because a blogger has a great command of the English language, he can’t be no street nigga—because a blogger understands verbs, adjectives, and nouns, he’s a computer geek who sits in the comfort of his own home and “Internet-thugs” his way into the hearts and lives of his least favorite rapper.

Well I wanna start a new trend for 2010! I wanna “Suge Knight” the blogging game! I wanna encourage hip-hop bloggers to get in the streets and shoot the first rapper that looks at them sideways! I wanna make it fashionable for bloggers to be thuggish-ruggish—not with just a pen—but with a ratchet—a hammer—that thang! Straight Rambo a rapper! I wanna see hip-hop bloggers on the Hip-Hop Police radar! Illseed! You wit’ me? Gyant! You got my back? Ron Mexico! This is your time baby-boy! Combat Jack! You ready to go to war? What it do Bossip? Dopeman! You ready to document this shit for Hood Box Office? Somebody holla at that ugly-ass dyke-bitch Sandra Rose and that fine-ass Nicole Bitchie bitch and tell them hoes we goin’ to war!

It’s time to come from behind our computer screens and take it to the (hip-hop) man.
I wanna be the first hip-hop blogger to shoot a famous rapper for G.P.—General Principle! Light his ass up and send him into hip-hop infamy!
But I ain’t tryna kill nobody.
I just wanna make your favorite rapper a member of the “Krip-Hop Nation” (Shout-out to Leroy Moore, founder of the Movement “Krip Hop” for disabled rappers/hip-hop heads. Google him!)—let him ride “ho-seat” with disabled rapper MF Grimm—make him depend on Depends! I’m tired of hearing about bloggers taking an “L.” Awhile back, video blogger, DJ Vlad, got his ass beat down to the white-meat by Rick Ross’s camp. (“Allegedly”)—just for asking about his C.O. background. The fuck?

2010—I’m on some “I wish a nigga would” type shit! I feel fatalistic. I feel like we about to have a “Showdown at the OK Corral”—some Wild West shoot’em up cowboy ish. Or, maybe I’m just old and delusional.
Stop threatening bloggers!

For cryin’ out loud! Can’t we bloggers write about hip-hop without threats of violence? Can’t we give our opinion without retribution? Can’t we entertain the hip-hop populace without looking over one shoulder? I’m just sayin’! Some of us bloggers won’t even go to a hip-hop concert for fear of being recognized and jumped on. Look at poor ol’ fatso Byron Crawford (of XXLmag.com)—the guy won’t even use a current picture on his blogs, for fear of being recognized! He’s so scurrred to leave his mama’s St. Louis basement that he might turn into that super-fat dude who had to be extricated from his house by Jerry Springer and the “Jaws of Life!” All kinds of heads wanna see him—Lupe Fiasco, Bun B, Kayslay, Joe Budden and even that egotistical grab-a-mic-from-a-white-bitch Kanye West would like to see this dude Byron out and about. Shesus Khryst! (Love you Remy Ma!) Give the guy a pass on the merits that he’s funny as hell and self-deprecating—hell, he shits on his own self—not to mention that his hip-hop observations are dead-on in many cases.

The problem is that some of you rappers take yourselves waaaaaay too goddamned serious!
That homophobic rapper Trick Trick wants to beat up a few bloggers over at XXL. (Can you say, “Ron Mexico?”).
You folk who follow my blogs know that I’m “Ya Gay Friend’s Favorite Straight Friend” (Hoodgrownonline.com bitches!)—that I write, blog, advocate, big-up and dick-ride (no homo) for gay and lesbian rappers who are entertaining mainstream crossover, so I get hella disses and threats by rappers—mostly straight and a few gay.

My biggest nemesis/threat comes from 50 Cent’s (underling/weed-carrier) rapper 40 Glocc, who’s got a hard-on (no homo for the 2nd time) to kick my ass! We got into it on Twitter for almost two hours over me advocating for gay rappers. (It didn’t help that he’d read my blog about him, Rapper 40 Glocc… Speaking of Faggots!, which he’d read.) He called me everything but a “Child of God,” prompting a certain high-profile DJ to step in and try to referee the situation—probably for my benefit, because 40 Glocc is a “real nigga” who might wanna see me in person.

If 40 Glocc caught me in the club—boy—I’d be new-mowed grass! (Not that he could kick my ass Mano-a-mano, but because his posse is always in tow. Guys who run in packs are always suspect in the fisticuffs game.) He and his Zoo-Life cohorts and dem would make mincemeat out of me! He’d stomp me out—or as they say in West Coast vernacular—I’d catch a fade. (Since when did a haircut become synonymous with getting beat the fuck up?)

I have no other choice! I’m gonna shoot a rapper and be the first blogger to do such. You don’t hear me though. I’m gonna tax some poor rapper’s ass (Fuck it! No homo for the 3rd time) and put us both into the Hip-Hop Hall of Shame! It’s gonna be some Ed Lover, “C’mon son!” shit—a segment on Star & Bucwild—some Allhiphop.com “Epic Fail” mess—some fuckery, coonery, buffoonery and niggardly shit that will exceed all those wack-ass Worldstarhiphop.com videos and garner 10 million views! I’ll be on the front page of Thisis50.com and Hip-Hop Weekly will profile me! I’ll finally be famous! I’m gonna be skinnin’ & grinnin’ before the cameras, as they arrest me—lookin’ like a religious crack-head in my trademark white turban. As I’m led away I’ll be shouting, “Long-live the Gay Hip-hop Movement!”

Just keep on threatening us bloggers and watch! Indeed, it will be a fucked-up day for hip-hop when a blogger blasts your favorite rapper! Don’t say I didn’t warn you! Done.

40 Glocc on Twitter going in on Blogger Khalil Amani over advocating for gays in hip-hop.

40GLOCC @khalilamani A NIGGA!! SUCK-IT-EZ!!NOW U FANTASIZING ABOUT ME!!.NO MORE CONVO 4U CUZ!!.YA HOMO THUG SHIT GOING 2FAR!.BEAT IT! 12:03 AM Dec 29th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani I’m NOT EMBARRASSED ABOUT MIS SPELLING SHIT!!lol!!I TAUGHT MYSELF TO READ RIGH COUNT $ETC.&MY KIDS KNOW I SAY FUKU DOOGLERS!LOL 12:02 AM Dec 29th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC khalilamani naw just was makin a fade for 5k.. Twitter had 2wait.lol.. Now I’m back u black liberachie ass nigga! 11:57 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani nigga u a FOUL VERSION OF DOOGLERS QUOTIN BIBLE SCRIPTURES!!..LOL 11:54 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani NIGGA I KNOW U DIDN’T JUST QUOTE A BIBLE VERSE 2DEFEND DOOGLERS!!!CUZ!!U OUTTA LINE NIGGA!!LOL!THIS NIGGA CRAZY!!LOL 11:27 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC I wish them stray bullets what have hit u dooglers!BUT YALL BE IN THE CLOSET DOOGLIN!THEY PASS YALL AND HIT INNOCENT PEEPS!LOL 11:25 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani CAN’T LIE!!I WON’T READ YO HOMO BLOG!!ON CRIP..I DON’T SUPPORT DOOGLERS!! 11:23 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani same way I talk on twitter I talk in real life!!.no AVATAR NIGGA RIGHT HERE..FUCK OUTTA HERE WIT THAT HOMO SHIT.LOL!! 11:21 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani u niggaz fucked up the youth wit that doogler shit!!GOD MADE ADAM&EVE!!NOT ADAM&STEVE!! 11:18 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani UNFORTUNALY MENIESHA ON A DIFF HIT-LIST..LOL..IF HE WANTED IT HE WOULD HAVE GOT IT.HE AINT WANT IT..LOL. 11:10 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani LATEST HIT WAS THE LAST NIGGA CAME UP POPPIN THAT BULLSHIT..LOL 11:02 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani LOL!!U JUST AS MUCH OF A THREAT AS THAT NIGGA..BOTH U NIGGAZ PROB BEEN MOLESTED!..FUCK U,FUCKA FAG!,&FUK MENIESHA!LOL 10:51 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani <---what make me mad is u standup 4fagz nigga!!I rather a man die as a man then as a (man-bitch=doogler=fag)u fuk the youth up! 10:50 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC ill never bite my tounge!!fucka doogler and the industry! 11:53 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

40GLOCC @khalilamani <---dont u got balls2blow!!GO FOLLOW @PEREZHILTON now dooglers ALLOWED HOMO THUG!!LOL U UNDA COVER BROTHA! 10:31 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from UberTwitter in reply to khalilamani

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